[DARKSARCASM]

My First Trip to Yangon. Honest FR from a newbie there.

Some info ...1 SGD approx 850 Kyat and 1USD approx 1200kyat

Temp due daytime: 38-40C but feels like a 100C with the High Humidity

Wearing Berms to clubs seems acceptable. Some even in sandals in little bit high end clubs too.

Traffic is a nighmare from 9am-8pm. At night its a breeze to get arn.

Taxi- No meters. Discuss before getting on board. A rough guide would be 2000kyat for a 10min ride. Some bigger taxis cost a little more.

Immigration can b a nightmare if arriving in the morn , esp SQ998. Lucky my kaki made arrangement to cut the Q as he has connections.
Other kakis who arrived on MI at arn 1700 said no issues at immigration.

Need visas( even for our red PP) to enter country. Can be applied on-line.


Day 1.

Massage at Golden Butterfly Hotel ( level 6)

A little ex .
30000 kyat for 90min of oil massage .
15000 kyat for 90 min of Thai massage.

Tried both on different days and it was awesome. Totally clean massage .
nice clean place too.

Evening did the usual touristy thing and visited the famous Pagado. A must see i guess. As a foreigner need to pay. can't remember but was like USD 10.

At night ended at JJ. ( 10pm) . Bottles are 60000 kyat( chivas) and they allow 6 ppl to enter without Cover. If not i think its 5000 kyat each gives u a beer too.
To say it was the hottest club is not a lie. Literally. The A/c there either does not work or turned off. They have portable Cooler fans around the club. ( u can see ppl crowding arn there) and ceiling fans which are useless.

But the quality of gals was like 4-8. Ratio of guys to gals 1:3.
Then there is a fashion show with models. Hmmm...cant understand why some are called models.

Anyways...Damage. Non-models 80000 kyat. Models 100000 kyat.
Pls agree on how much time they will stay and kinda services they provide. Cause i realize that many gals don't blow. Btw, most gals don't speak good or any English at all. U can ask the waiters to bring the gal u like and also ask them to translate for u. Some even speak Malay.

Hotels are guest friendly. Had to pay 10000 kyat.

Back to me....took a 22yr gal. in the club she was bubbly and fun and in the room what a anti-climax. Calling her dead fish is not fair to the fishes. Kicked her out and slept alone.

Day 2.

Day time had to meet clients and do boring stuff.

Nighttime went to BME. Again bottles are cheap. ( think 70000 kyat for a 1 litre Black)
A bit more classier than JJ. Good A/C . Ratio of Guys to gals. 2:1.
Mostly young at 19-21 yrs. Rating were like 5-8. Saw 1 liked. Nego for 80000 kyat for the night. But ny frens wanted to go JJ as they did not like anyone there. They made me ditch her. ( what a boo boo).

Ended up at JJ for another HOT night. The place was not as crowded as the previous night, but still warm .
There was this group of gals in the dance floor who were partying and not really interested when guys approached them. I liked one of them with a pan asian look. Told the waiter to call her but she refused. KNN. But she also refused other guys .....so not so bad.
But end of the night the waiter brought her to me. WTF. Apparently she is a model and cost 100000kyat. Had ato 50000 kyat at the club and remaining to the gal later.
Long story short. Awesome face and body. 19 yrs old. Zero English tho she is a 2nd yr UNI student studying Physics.
To start with she was on the phone the whole journey from JJ to hotel ( talking to her fashion coordinator, whatever that means) and then in the room on FB for 20 mins till I lost patience.
She said in her little ENglish that she was celebrating her frens Bday and thus rejecting the guys.
Ok , she showered and i did too. When I came out of the bathroom ..she was sound asleep. KNN. Ok, nvm asked her if she wants to sleep and we can continue in the morn. She said she had to leave for UNI at 7am.
Now...all she does is lie down. She does not blow( to be fair I did not ask in the club as I thot I was damn lucky to get the gal a lot of guys wanted)
Zero forplay. KNN could not even get it up. Guess what..... paid her kicked her out too.

So far 0:2. ( 0 is me btw)

Day 3

Went to Park royal. Very nice club. Bottles a little more ex. Ratio abt the same as BME. Filipino band playng there. Seriously the worst band I have ever seen. The last straw was when they murdered GNR's Sweet Child of Mine.

Anyways...think there are many Pinoys plying their trade there Most speak English well as this club caters for foreigners. ( unlike JJ where there are mostly local guys) Rating were like 5-8 again. Ratio 3:1.
This time , I did not fancy anyone and so did my frens. Guess where we ended up....JJ. ( still have not learnt my lessons). But my other kakis gals from JJ for the last 2 days were good according to them.

We reached arn 1am. This time the crowd was thin. ( SAT). Ratio of guys to gals. 2:1 or even 3:1. Saw a gal i liked and B4 i can get to her I was intercepted. Settled for a standby gal I eyed. 80000 kyat for whole night and she said she does everything.
In the room. realized she sad saggy breast ( damn padded bras). Nice butt and and the first fully shaven gal.
Ok it was a crappy blow and I did enter her. But I lost my interest within 2 mins. No chemistry at all. Maybe its the language barrier. Maybe drank too much. Guess what I stopped ,paid and asked her to leave.

So 0:3.


Ok bros ...thats it. These are purely my experience. My other kakis had hits and misses. ( mostly misses) . The gals are still very kampong. Not much English. Many are ok looking. Mostly fair looking gals. But not fair to expect BKK kinda wildness.
Ppl are freindly. Food is cheap. Beers are cheap and nicer than our Tiger.

Enjoy Bros.....