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Old 17-06-2023, 11:26 AM
haikim999 haikim999 is offline
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Re: Study: Why do guys cheat?

Quote:
Originally Posted by alleycat View Post
after birth of my 2nd kid in 2016, suddenly wife doesnt want sex anymore. Its like a switch went off. I faced countless rejections. Not even cuddles in bed anymore. Previously, she'd would want sex a lot.

we had a huge argument over the deadbedroom situation sometime back, nearly led to a divorce. One of her remarks was "I only wanted sex to have kids". Man, that truly hurt.

Since 2016 till now, we only had sex total of 6 times. That's like once a year of deadfish 'obligatory' sex.

I struggled with this a lot previously. Always fantasized that me n wifey could go back to our great fucks when we were dating/early marriage. Then i slowly thought over and realised its not worth killing myself over this. (yes i had depression and suicide tendencies). I have 2 beautiful daughters who really love me, and for that I'm really grateful.

I changed my mindset. Decided to not let the sex issue get better of me. I decided to be a happier husband and dad. Now I go GL if I cannot supress the urge (which on average once every 4 months).

And this lifestyle kind of works for now. Me n wifey are actually happier with each other (of cos she doesnt know my side hobby), probably because i no longer pressure her into sex. We still hold hands going out, still have our playful banter, just zero sex or intimate cuddles. Basically a married room mate. Kids are happy to see us happy too. One day, as I get older, my libido will slowly die off too and that'll be the end of my GL/FL seeking days.

When i was a teenager and single, I despised men who cheated. Always thought that men should always be faithful to their wives. As I grew, and now in my mid forties, I realised that life isnt all that black and white. Its only going through actual experience and long term struggles that I understood this.
Have u communicated to her that you can't survive in the relationship without sex? It's like some ladies crave for intimacy, commitment, it's part of our needs too

Have u ever asked her if can have open relationship?